Identifying gaslighting behavior and knowing how to combat gaslighting are essential to maintaining your self-esteem, and mental and emotional health. Gaslighting is a form of narcissistic abuse that’s used not only by narcissists, but also by sociopaths, addicts, and other abusers. Sometimes it’s intentional, and sometimes it has become a habit to hide and maintain power.
Understanding Gaslighting
The term gaslighting comes from the movie Gaslight with Charles Boyer and Ingrid Bergman in which the character played by Boyer slowly tries to make Bergman’s character think that she’s losing her mind in order to steal from her.
Gaslighting is not an occasional lie or denial. It’s a pattern of behavior calculated to make you trust the perpetrator, confuse you, and make you doubt your own perceptions, sanity, memory, or feelings. It’s based on the need for control or concealment – often of an affair or gambling, or financial information or losses.
You can recognize gaslighting by the 5 M’s:
- Methodical
- Malicious
- Manipulation
- Motive: to undermine your
- Mind
Identifying Gaslighting Behavior
There are three categories of gaslighting behavior. The first are statements that devalue you and demean your opinions, feelings, perceptions, or memory.
Demeaning Statements
Demeaning statements are intended to undermine your self-esteem and self-trust. Many abusers use manipulation and emotional abuse to …
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