Breaking up can seem like the easy way out, but trust me, it never is. Also, going to marriage counseling does not mean that your relationship is ending. The vast majority of couples I see in my practice stay together. The choice to go to counseling shouldn’t be forced upon you, however. It needs to be something that both partners agree to do.
Marriage counseling is about gaining skills to communicate better and about learning what behaviors both of you need to change so that you can move closer to each other. Sometimes a crisis drives a couple to therapy, but even when something formerly unthinkable happens, most people have the ability to learn and move forward, together.
I tell my couples that therapy is about time and talk, and neither should end when the session does. It’s a good idea to go out afterward and talk and enjoy the evening. You can make it a date night with a dash of therapy. I also like to remind couples that the more time they spend doing homework (reading helpful books and doing some simple communication exercises), the less time they are going to spend with me.
If you invest time …
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